I'm trying something different. I need something different.

In less than two months time I will be 30. It's not a fear that's come over me. It's not joy or anxiety really. I just feel a need. Really it's just a number and doesn't have that much of a difference if you think about it . How is it that much different compared to 29 or 31. It has no meaning unless you decide to give it meaning. It's not a big deal unless you choose to make it a big deal. But it's in our nature... or perhaps in our culture... to make these things a big deal. Birthday, anniversaries, which grade you are in school, your years of tenure at work. All our lives we've been counting up and marking milestones.

Yesterday I went to ArtOMatic, a Washington DC Art festival featuring works of local artists. And I had the pleasure of meeting Frank Warren, the founder of PostSecret, who signed for me a copy of the fourth book in the series.

"Have I received anything you from you before?" He asked me.

"Well no. But I think you do great work. Perhaps I'll contribute something in the future." I replied. That question surprised me. And it made me smile to think that not many people in the world can ask a question like that and have it make sense or be meaningful.

He offered to personalize it for me, and I took this chance to ask him for advice at this point in my life. He wrote:

"Make secrets not before it's too late."

Hmm... Very fitting. He hit the nail on the head really. Maybe he's developed an intuition for these things. In all my years I don't think I've ever felt any intense regret until that one unspoken of instance almost four months ago. I feel like I want to express those related feelings and all the craziness of all the events in some work of art. Though I'm not sure the form it will take and how much I should reveal. Should it be be an art piece, a story, or an anonymous contribution to PostSecret?

It's weird because the event seems like it's shaping me into discovering the person I want to be. Though it's not one of these stories you can share with someone you don't know well. It's tragic, ironic, comical and inspirational all at the same time. There was an incredibly rare opportunity I declined. But what's done is done and there's no easy way to say it was the right or wrong decision. Time will only tell what impact it will have. As the final days of my 20s march away I feel this need. This need that I can't let this chapter conclude in mediocrity.

I'm trying something different. I plan to set a different goal every morning when I wake up until my birthday. Then I'm going to nail that goal with all my heart and soul. It's uncanny and I may have said this before, but for some reason my life wants to be awesome. Not me. My life. Circumstances arise that make life surprising and interesting. So what should you do if your life wants to be awesome? Man up!

In the beginning Microsoft made Windows:

    
Recently the new Logo for Window 7 was released:

Now fellow blog readers my secret underground army of cloak and dagger ninja monkeys have infiltrated Microsoft's top secret files to reveal to you this... a preview of Windows T:

Is it just me or does something seem afoot? I think we need to invoke an even higher power to uncover Microsoft's plot. The physical skills of ninja monkeys can only do so much. No, we need magic. Time magic specifically... And so bending space and time... I now present to you this portal the next phase of their master plan... Windows Z:

Cue the Russian music.

Note: I stumbled across the possible 7 logo design, but it may not be the final one released. Some articles hint it looks something more like this.

I was totally blown away. Every time I have good news to share with my sister, she one ups me with a bigger announcement. Last time I got promoted she was engaged. This time I’m going to be an uncle!

And that's not the only big news tonight. My older brother is engaged! The last speed bump is out of the way. Hah. Congrats to him. I’m China-bound in November, baby!

First off I want to sincerely thank all the kind words, the willingness to listen, and just general overall support that my good friends have given me the last two weeks. A super shiny star for that awesome person who stayed up listening to my rants until the wee hours last night. I owe you a steak dinner for sure.

Now that the craziness has subsided I'm really excited about the coming new responsibilities. I did the whole "expectations" talk with one of my new direct reports. I think I have this pretty well structured now, so that its closer to the ideal type of conversation I want when establishing a manager/report relationship. Want things to start off on the right foot and have a plan develop. So that will be my new focus in the near future. To really kick ass at work and my new expanded role.

Even if I don't have the greatest of luck with relationships right now, at least I can rock in what I know I'm good at. Doing my job. And I like it too. I'm also going to look to develop better habits now. So please be supportive. Sticking with my 2009 theme. Strong and Sensible. One horrible character flaw of mine is that I'm late to the game with thing too often. Gotta get on that.

She's a very sweet girl. I didn't imagine we'd be talking as long as we did, but it was real nice to have a wholehearted conversation with someone. I missed that. It's nice to have a part of that again... someone willing to open up to you. Have someone listen intently to what you say and appreciate that you're listening to them.

Funny thing is that she asked me my age. I was asked that by five or six different people in the last two weeks. Which really made me wonder if I really look that much younger than I really am. All the other people's guesses have been 4 to 5 years younger than I my true age. But she's much closer in her guess coming 1 to 2 years short.

Facebook is funny this way. It puts pictures in your face without you even looking for it.

I clicked on a picture of Yukino a short while ago, which lead me an album where's she's giving a kiss.
"Wow." I thought.

Then I noticed on her profile that she's in a new relationship.
"Thank you." A voice in my head said those words. I was surprised at my own first reaction.

You go about never really understanding your thoughts about a given situation sometimes. And it takes a unscripted reaction of a change really happening... really happening... before you know the truth past all the clouded thoughts.

Now I know some of you may read this and think that he's only saying this to kid himself. Because sometimes people say things... write things... to make others believe a lie... to make themselves believe a lie. And I may have second guessed myself too if not for the fact that my first feeling after the shock settled was this. Relief. Happiness for someone. I realized too that I at least cared enough for her to be happy at this very moment.

Heh. wouldn't have guessed it.

And the other ironic thing is... my computer hard drive crashed last weekend.

No no. It's not a complete non sequitur. I have a point. I did something moronic when my hard drive crashed which ended up formatting the entire drive. Essentially I lost all my personal content which I didn't back up. This meant I lost a huge volume of personal documents, pictures, videos, and music files. And although I was thoroughly upset, I wasn't hysterical at all. Loss happens. Some families lose much more valuable things in fires, floods, and other tragic disasters. Being able to let go is important in life because we all have to face it at some point. So in a way I was mentally prepared to take another hit.

Heh. Things are funny like that. Sometimes I wonder whether my life story isn't just written by some quirky author.

A friend brought Russian candy to the office, and on the wrapping paper were silhouettes of squirrels. (Top left green and gold candy)

I commented that those pictures make the squirrel ears look like slug antennae. Soon afterward a coworker did some research and sure enough... Russian squirrels have freakishly weird ears:

So at first glance they look a lot like Wolverine, no?

Then the same coworker mentioned that they were "soooo cute" and looked like anime characters. I was like, really? Then I thought about it... They do look like something... can't quite put my finger on it...

Ahah! Hardsuits from Bubble Gum Crisis!

Well in honor of the first annual international "That's What She Said" Day, I'm sharing the most recent TWSS moments I can remember. It's no surprise that I first heard about this day at work. Our office is like that. We appreciate that sort of humor and many folks follow "The Office". Here are the flavors that they come in.

Crunching Numbers:
"First it was too small, now it looks too big."
“It is unbelievable. You need to sniff.”
"How deeply in theory can we go?”

Eating Competitions:
"I have no idea how that's going to fit in my mouth."
"How many more can fit inside?"
"It's stuffed with sugar-coated nuts."
"I need a napkin. I bit into one and goo dripped all over my hands."
"It doesn't count if you didn't swallow."

Random Day with a Bedazzler:
"That doesn't look quite right. It's just poking out of there."
"This tiny one doesn't work. I need a larger stud."
"You need to put more effort into it and really ram it down."

Other Side Conversations:
"I don't understand why it's so hard."
"It's too big for me."
"I don't want to touch it. It's going to pop."
"Are you on top of that, his thingie?"
"Maybe he got right on, and made it happen 3am in the morning."

And here are two that didn't come from the work environment.

Courtesy of my cousin's marathon:
"She's right in front of you! Come on! You have to push it!!"

And just earlier today, I was watching the playback of the live in-theaters broadcast of This American Life:
"You have talked about the epically long process of sucking."

As the holidays turn the corner and the year ends, my feeling and thoughts come in waves. It's natural that we all begin to reflect on our past year. So many memories. Ups and downs. Beauty and pain. Surprises and successes.

If I were to put my emotions right now in song, this one would sum it up pretty nicely:
Christmas Canon

Pachelbel's Canon is just one of the most beautiful songs imaginable, because I believe it reflects life the best. It's sad and happy. It reflects and it looks forward.

I'm officially a Virginia resident now. Woohoo! There's a lot to be excited about. This year I'm going to stay in DC for the holidays and I'm absolutely stoked about the folks who will be visiting. It will be the first time my two younger cousins will be in this area, and I get to play tour guide... and older brother of course. Also several super awesome friends will be visiting so I'm going to try and fill up our hang-out sessions with exciting stuff.

Happy Holidays All!

So a big plus about having an iPod is that I listen to sooo much music I like now. Every once in a while I come across a the tune of a song and then have an A-hah moment... where you realize that the tune from a song you've listened to over and over again actually came from another familiar song...

For example, what was the inspiration to the intro beat of "Hung Up" by Madonna? The intro tune kicks in at around 00:30 of the video.

The Answer is this 1979 hit.

Here's another tune link that I just discovered today. Can you tell what music is found in the intro this One Vo1ce song?

The Answer is this 1980 love song. It's just a little slower of a jingle.